Treehouse of Horror IX
Hell Toupée Snake is arrested for smoking inside the Kwik-E-Mart. Chief Wiggum explains that after burning down an orphanage and blowing up a bus full of nuns (which Snake claims was self-defense) this is Snake's third strike, so he will be executed in accordance with the three strikes law. Before hauling Snake away, Chief Wiggum helpfully points out that Apu, Moe and Bart are all witnesses; Snake threatens to kill all of them. Snake is executed in the electric chair on World's Deadliest Executions, hosted by Ed McMahon and proudly broadcast on Fox. Chief Wiggum then sends the body to the hospital to be carved up for organ donations. Shortly afterwards, Homer visits Dr. Nick Riviera, who gives him a transplant of a full head of still-smoldering hair. The hair is Snake's, and when Homer goes to sleep the following night, it plants its roots in Homer's brain. With the hair controlling his mind, Homer murders Apu by stuffing him in his own Squishee machine. Homer later removes Moe's heart with a corkscrew and leaves him slumped facefirst in a bowl of Penicill-Os cereal. Bart realizes that the other two witnesses have been killed, but is shocked when his own father comes after him. He begs Homer to fight the hair and, after a struggle, Homer rips the hair off his head. The hair tries to smother Bart and then, as Wiggum bursts through the door with Eddie and Lou, jumps toward the window. Wiggum opens fire and the hair is riddled with bullets and is thus used as a blanket by Maggie. The story closes with Wiggum remarking, "That's what I call a bad hair day!" The Terror of Tiny Toon Marge forbids Bart and Lisa from watching the Itchy and Scratchy Halloween special, even going to the lengths of taking the batteries out of the remote control. They refuse to go trick-or-treating with Marge as Homer is dressed as a hobo and Maggie is dressed as a pirate. But when Marge goes, Bart finds a small piece of highly unstable plutonium in Homer's toolbox and hammers it into the remote's battery slot. When they use the remote, the kids actually enter the world of Itchy and Scratchy. They watch Itchy decapitate Scratchy when he trick or treats at his house and use his head in the manner of a Jack-o-lantern. While the two laugh, Scratchy's head asks why Bart and Lisa are laughing to which Itchy replies that they are laughing at his misfortune. Scratchy re-attaches his head to his body, declares what the duo did was mean, and forms a partnership with Itchy to "teach them a lesson". They then throw deadly objects at Bart and Lisa. As they try to escape, the hated character Poochie (voiced again by Dan Castellaneta/Homer Simpson) passes by, but he is run down by their car. They escape from the car, and wind up on Live with Regis and Kathie Lee in a pot of soup because Homer changed the channel. Bart and Lisa return to Itchy and Scratchy's house when he changes the channel back. Lisa urges Homer to press the "exit" button, which gets her and Bart (whose body was devoured from the neck down by piranhas, leaving only his skeleton) out of the TV. She presses the "rewind" button on the remote to restore Bart's flesh, but unfortunately, Itchy and Scratchy smash through the screen. However, they emerge the same size as their real animal equivalents, and they are therefore harmless. Homer decides to make Itchy a pet, and Snowball II falls in love with Scratchy. However, Marge decides to neuter him, causing Scratchy to scream while covering his crotch. Starship Poopers On an ordinary day, Marge discovers Maggie's first baby tooth, which appears to be a sharp fang. Maggie later loses her "baby legs" and grows green tentacles. Marge decides to take her to Dr. Hibbert, who prescribes "Fire, and lots of it!" after Maggie crunches his equipment with her fang. At home, it is found that Maggie can contact somebody by sucking extra-rapidly on her pacifier, which appears to be the alien duo, Kang and Kodos. They arrive at the Simpson house, coming to retrieve Maggie. Marge reveals that Kang is Maggie's real father and retells the story: Kang and Kodos abducted her while she was doing laundry, selecting Marge for a cross-breeding program. She says the aliens used mind-control techniques on her (Kang simply pointed and said "Look behind you!" before zapping her with an insemination ray). She recalls that nine months after the abduction, Maggie was born. Kang and Kodos demand that the Simpsons give Maggie to them and a struggle ensues. Both Homer, Marge, and aliens start to fight over Maggie until Bart (who is angered by this) stops them and suggests that there can be only one way to solve the problem: let the Simpsons appear on The Jerry Springer Show, with Homer and Kang fighting it out. When they appear to discuss things, Kang uses his ray gun to vaporize an annoying audience for criticizing him. During Jerry's "final thought" Maggie attacks Jerry and kills him while Homer and Kang resume fighting. Jerry, Homer and Kang swear a lot in the process with Marge swearing once to express the humiliation of it all. Kang and Kodos now threaten to kill every American politician unless the Simpsons give Maggie to them. Marge and the Simpsons slyly imply that the aliens couldn't possibly kill every politician, and as they fly off to do so, Bart reminds them not to forget Ken Starr. Just when they're about to leave, Maggie takes out her pacifier and tells everyone in an alien voice "very well, I'll drive! Ha ha ha! I need blood!". Category:Episodes Category:The Simpsons Episodes